4 Thoughts or Fiction, Cultural Corner

I Have Kinks, But I Am Also A Fetish

I had a bit of trouble thinking of anything to write about for 4 Thoughts or Fiction. You see, the topic is Kink vs. Fetish and I don’t know much about fetishes besides the fact that I’ve fallen into a category of one. Scottish Lass provides the following description of kinks and fetishes:

Kinks are defined as something sexually non-conventional whereas a fetish is the sexual gratification gained from an object, piece of clothing or body part.


I’m aroused by people not objects or certain body parts. I’ve never had a fetish. While I’ve recently acquired a taste for lingerie, it’s not a fetish. Lingerie itself doesn’t arouse me, but the fantasies I have while wearing lingerie do.

However, I am a fetish. How? Well, every now and then, I talk about being Asian, more specifically Japanese.

I’ve never really understood the thrill in race play. To me it sounds like a bit of an excuse to be a racist. I’ll certainly speak to a man in Japanese while we’re having sex if that’s his fantasy, but reducing me down to a “dirty jap” in bed isn’t going to go down so well.

It’s not just race play that seems to be an issue, it’s fetishizing certain races. Many do not see it as a compliment, but more so creepy and racist.

I am an Asian woman and therefore have been made a fetish.

How Asian Fetishes Began

The history of the fetishization of Asian women began during WW2. Many do not know what happened to spark this fetish, but you’re about to learn.

During WW2, Japan basically turned Japanese women into sex slaves. They were forced into prostitution with the sole purpose of providing sexual service to U.S. soldiers. After the war ended, there was something called the “Recreation and Amusement Association.” Through this association Japanese women were still forced to serve foreign soldiers. This continued on through the Korean and Vietnam wars.

It created a stereotype that Asian women are subservient and pretty much open their legs on command.

What’s Wrong With An Asian Fetish?

An Asian fetish or really any fetish involving race, no longer sees us as individuals. It reduces us down to the stereotypical views about our race.

Now, I have no problem with those who like Asian women. Go ahead…I mean I need some loving too, but when the stereotypes are at the forefront of your desire for an Asian woman, then you need to rethink this attraction.

Dr. Justin Lehmiller states, “Kinks and fetishes are only considered problems when (1) one fulfills their desires by engaging in non-consensual behaviors, (2) when they pose an unacceptable level of risk or harm to the self or to others, and/or (3) they cause severe psychological distress or impairment.”

Now this may be just subjective thinking on my part, but couldn’t Asian fetishism be considered a problem? The way I see it is that sometimes, there is non-consensual behaviors toward women of Asian descent. It can also lead to hostile and potentially emotionally abusive environments.

So like all the Asian women you want, but remember that we’re all different and cannot be lumped into a stereotype. Not all Asian women will be submissive docile.


Is submission really a kink? To the more vanilla world, it certainly is. My submission is not just sexually; submissiveness is just a part of who I am.

Does this feed into the Asian fetish? I sometimes wonder about this. But I can’t change who I am and I couldn’t be dominant even if I wanted to. To me, submission is not just a kink; it’s a part of what makes me…well, me.

I need to please others. While yes, I can be a brat at times especially when there’s a bit of an age gap between my partner and I, there is still a desire to be that good little obedient girl. I’m sorry if that adds to the stereotype that many Asian women are stuck with.

CL likes to see lingerie and boobs so I find myself taking more photos like this to show him. Pleasing him is something that is pleasurable for me. I guess that’s the submissive nature in me. Thankfully, he doesn’t fetishize my culture, though, maybe he does so with my boobs haha.

How Does Submission Tie Into My Kinks?

Just because submission isn’t just a kink to me doesn’t mean it doesn’t influence other kinks. Some of the kinks that I’m into are degradation, humiliation, and bondage.

With each, there is a bit of power play involved. Degradation and humiliation are inflicted on me by someone more dominant than I am. What this could look like is stripping me of my clothing and making me remain naked in their presence. Or with bondage, I’m being tied up. I’m naked, bound, and helpless. Essentially, the person has taken away my control.

But this is what I enjoy. It’s what arouses me. They’re my kinks, but that shouldn’t make me or those that look like me a fetish.

Yours Truly,
sass c.

4 Thoughts or Fiction - Kinks v Fetish

sass c.

i'm just your average girl with a dirty mind. young, asian and submissive...does that pique your interest? constantly in a battle with myself whether to stay confined by my cultural values or to break free like the freak i am.

Instagram: @thesassysubdaily
Twitter: @sassysubdaily

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  1. Brilliant post Sass and some interesting points covered. Thank you so much for sharing this
    May x

    1. Thanks 😊

  2. I was intrigued when I saw the title of your post. I only recently became more aware of how someone can have a partiality to a people of a certain culture or of physical features that may be associated with being from a particular area.

    I wrote a post that I have not published yet because for me, I can be attracted to men of all heights, builds, shades of skin – but personality is a key factor as to whether I would go further. Ben is from an Irish Greek background. He has dark hair and eyes and he tans well, but he also has cute freckles and curls. He is a 50/50 split of the features his Greek relatives have and his Irish relatives. His family were close to other Greek families in their area and when he first started dating it was all girls from Greek families – all very pretty girls. But he told me he had grown up thinking Pamela Anderson was the perfect woman, so he felt drawn to women who resembled PA. He told me that there came a point where he realized that his eyes were drawn only to PA types.

    I said that it seemed weird to be attracted to people from one physical profile, when you could be missing out on so many wonderful people who do not match that profile. Ben thinks it’s not that unusual. I guess it’s just because I find lots of people physically attractive, I am more aroused or put off by their personality and the way the speak/behave.

    Another beautiful boob picture from you Sass <3

    1. I think it’s rather common especially in the age of swiping left or right. But even before online dating, preferences for a certain type of people was rather prevalent. For me, while I have dated Asian men, I’m not attracted to them physically and most of the time, their personalities are a turn off as well. I just don’t want to be with someone that reminds me of my dad and typically most Asian men do that for me haha.

      1. Maybe that’s where I am a bit behind with the times. I don’t know the online dating mentality. I have met a guy online for a date, but it was a total blind date. It went ok though. We had coffee and went to see a movie. Afterwards we had a meal together. I knew I did not want a second date, but I enjoyed the first.

        My first boyfriend was gorgeous Sass he really did look like Tom Cruise, but his attitude and his views and the way he treated other people became a real problem to me over time. He was not always like that. He just became more arrogant as he grew older. I could not bear it.

        That taught me that personality was so much more important to me than looks.

  3. Well, when I look at you I don’t see a sexy Asian, I see a sexy woman. This would be a delicious photo to receive.

    1. Aww thank you. 😘 I guess you better check your inbox then 😝

  4. I guess I might be one of those guys that ‘like’ asian women sass. Always in a positive and protective way.

    1. It wasn’t to shame anyone from liking Asian women, but point out how often times, many just reduce us down to our ethnicities rather than see us as individuals. We’re not all the same. While I’m submissive, some Asian are very dominant.

  5. […] “An Asian fetish or really any fetish involving race, no longer sees us as individuals. It reduces us down to the stereotypical views about our race.” READ MORE … […]

  6. This was a very interesting, informative post. I had not known about what happened during WWII and it’s quite shocking, and if still sending out ripples it’s a shame. I agree with your disdain for this type of fetishising.

    Learning a bit more about you and your kinks was fascinating, and the pictures were lovely – thanks for sharing.

    1. Thank you. I think that a lot of Japan’s history is rather secretive. What you learn in the textbooks only hits the surface. I hear that even in Japan, the education of their own history is lacking. But I love that sort of stuff. I dig and dig and dig to find out what happened haha.

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