It’s officially four months with my Dom today. I don’t know what I’d do without him. I’m a complete mess, an emotional wreck and he puts up with me and the baggage I come with.
It’s becoming clearer to me that in terms of emotional support, he’s all I have. I’ve been dating someone for the past three months and even though I have feelings for him, I don’t think he feels the same way so he plays with my emotions and drives me insane trying to figure out where we’re headed. So I think that he’s trying to get rid of me. Maybe I’m just overthinking things and maybe I am just insane. But if he isn’t honest with me, I might end things because I can’t keep doing this. I’m the one who’s hurting because of it.
That leaves me with my Dom who’s a million miles away, but seems to care about me more so than a guy that lives a couple towns over.
I had started to think that maybe that guy I was dating would be someone I’d have a future with, but now I don’t know. I was falling for him which is why the way he’s acting hurts so much.
I wasn’t one to get attached before. Pushing people away was my defense mechanism because I didn’t want to get hurt. It was also to prevent the past from repeating itself. I didn’t want to get attached to someone ended up abusing me again.
But I got attached this time. I let him see more of me than I had let others see in the past.
It’s becoming clear to me that Sir is the only man who cares about me. Four months with him and he always makes me happy. Even with the distance, it’s not so complicated. I know what I am to him.
I am thankful for Sir. With my feelings of loneliness and emotional hurt, he’s still there for me. Even when he’s busy, he still makes some time for me or he’ll communicate that he’s been busy. With that being said, I love my Dom and no one else can ever replace him.
The Sassy Sub Daily