BDSM, Life

I Like It Rough

When I had lost my virginity, the guy was very gentle with me. He took control, but he made sure he didn’t hurt me. It was like this each time we had sex. It was something I appreciated at first because the first time really hurt. Either he would remove my clothing or tell me to strip. He would tell me where he wanted me…on my back or sucking his dick. I thought I liked this because I really didn’t know what I was doing, but I still like being told what to do sexually. Turns out, I wasn’t just inexperienced, I was also submissive.

The next guy I slept with was a bit rougher with me. He spanked me and choked me. He told me that he was making me his bitch. He pounded roughly into my cunt. It wasn’t about my needs. He took what he wanted then ghosted me.

After that, I wanted to be fucked in that way again. Though, I don’t really trust most guys to experiment with breath play on me. I may enjoy rough play, but I’m not trying to die in the middle of a kinky moment. Rather not have someone identify my body that way.

The thing is, I don’t really meet too many guys who are willing to play a bit more roughly. Most guys I meet are rather vanilla so a rough fuck is what I crave.

Spank me. Punish me. Torture me. It turns me on. I like it rough and I came to play.

Yours Truly,

The Sassy Sub Daily

sass c.

i'm just your average girl with a dirty mind. young, asian and submissive...does that pique your interest? constantly in a battle with myself whether to stay confined by my cultural values or to break free like the freak i am.

Instagram: @thesassysubdaily
Twitter: @sassysubdaily

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  1. It is because most guys are taught not to be rough with the flower. That just have a lot to do with communication and feeling each other out at first. When you are getting to know people it is understandable that you don’t want to scare them off so we put on a mask. Not saying being upfront is bad but you just don’t want to overwhelm them. Talking and getting everything to an understandable level is great.

    1. The guy I’m currently seeing knows what I like, but won’t do it. I can’t even get him to spank me. He said he’s just never been like that. I wish he would, but at the same time, I wouldn’t want to change someone just to benefit me.

  2. I have mixed feelings about that. You are right not to change a person. But not to feed your submissiveness is going to hurt you in the long run. Because it is the same for a DOM we need to eat, sleep, and take deep pleasure in our Dominance. Your are right you can’t change him and you don’t need to but will you end up changing for him?

    1. I feel as though I’m in a lose-lose situation. I have to sort of just settle for what it is or else I won’t be having sex. I’m very upfront about how I am sexually. I’ve been just open about it from before I even have sex with a guy. Most of the time, I get the, “I’m not that kind of guy” or “I’d want to try to do…on you.” Most of the time, the guy wants to try breath play. They’ve never done so and I don’t really trust them.

      1. Breath play I don’t want to say it is easy. But it kinda is there are colors in the face you have to look for and you really have to know your own strength and hand positioning or other things that restricts the air flow. But if the trust is not there it can end really bad really quick.

  3. The is to many resources out that can give a small basic overview but I always recommend that you do it under instruction. I personally had done a lot of self study for years to get my craft down pack, then I finally reached out to a teacher and took my knowledge to a different level of awareness. Setting that trust foundation is key to a safe environment and knowing when to stop. If you can’t stop you shouldn’t play.

    1. Many of the guys who want to “try” things are inexperienced in BDSM anything. I think it’s easier to be inexperienced as a sub than it is as a Dom. When it comes to choking/breath play, my life could literally be in their hands. They could easily cause damage to my windpipe or larynx. It’s why I stay away from it. That is one part of rough play, that I could definitely do without especially with someone who has never done it before.

      I would also prefer not to be a young new Dom’s guinea pig haha. The inexperienced need not apply haha.

      1. Very very understandable. But everyone is everyone’s guinea pig when you are new to each other. But having being with others and been vetted is way better.

        So spanking and being tied up and thrown around is more your speed?

        1. Yes, definitely more my speed. Once, I slept with a guy who made me put on a blindfold before he let me in. I had never seen his face before. He stripped me and tied me to the bed. Then he used a flogger on me before he fucked me. Not knowing what the person who is fucking you looks like is pretty erotic, but not if I’d do it regularly haha. For all I know, he could be an 80 something year old man with no teeth haha.

          1. But he might be be amazing with the flogger.

            1. Haha but I don’t know if I’d want to have sex with someone that old. What if he went into cardiac arrest right on top of me? I would be restrained and couldn’t do a thing. Try explaining that situation to paramedics or whoever finds me

            2. That is easy…it was his last dying wish…haha.

            3. Hahaha to fuck a twenty-something year old? Gives me the jeebies thinking that someone that old would be touching me like that. I know I like older men, but I don’t think that applies to ancient men haha.

            4. But the great thing is you have a choice. You can choose what you prefer. Women always have the choice men don’t.

            5. How is it that men don’t have the choice? I would think men do have the choice as if a woman in her 50s had sex with a 21 year old, she’d be labeled as a cougar or a cradle robber. It’s not as weird if a man in his 50s had sex with a 21 year old though. If anything the 21 year old girl would be judged for trying to find a sugar daddy haha.

            6. The times. That what the world’s view, women have the power if you haven’t realized. The funny thing is it that men really think they can control women. Women have to give it to a man. Once I realized this I took on a different Master role. Searching for a woman or women(it depends on the situation). That is why man has to be smarter than women which is hard but not impossible. A lot of men are single-minded and not able to look at things a different way, where a woman can look at multiply sides all at once and come up with 12 different routes.

            7. I agree with the being smarter part haha. I wouldn’t submit to a man who can’t challenge me mentally. It probably makes it even harder because I have a logical mind with a creative soul, yet I’m sarcastic/savage. My mind seems to move at a million miles a minute. I could banter all day if no one shuts me up. In order to do that, a man has to definitely outsmart me and put me in my place.

            8. Which is the reason why if a man is not studying women he will be losing everything including his mind. But being surround by women all the time is not the way to do it. You have to find what makes you amazing then figure out how to be amazing at other things that relate to the first amazing thing. Build then build upon the success.

            9. I think the fact that I write and my Dom reads just about everything has given him an insight of how my mind works. He’s very intelligent and at the beginning asked me some questions to figure me out a bit. As trust was built, which was rather easy with him, he became someone I confide in, both good and bad…not just about sex or BDSM, but life in general.

            10. I love hearing about people connecting on that level. I makes me so happy that there are even happier people.

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