Someone told me that there are many advantages to being single as a submissive. She said, “You literally have your one person, but you can pretty much fuck anyone you want to fuck as well.” I guess that’s an advantage for some people, but the negatives of sleeping around would be the many nights spent in alone in an empty bed.
I get into this little funk after I have sex with a random guy. It lasts a few days, but it feels really dark. I’m definitely a cuddler. Post-sex or in between rounds, I like to be snuggled up against the guy as we let our breathing return to normal. When there are cuddles, I’m pretty much high as a kite. The endorphins take over and it fills me with such joy.
When I come home, I feel a bit empty inside. I’ll be sleeping alone again. On those days, I don’t exactly want to be around people, but I also don’t want to be alone. I just want someone to hold me and to help me keep the bed warm.
Meaningless sex is exactly that…meaningless. I don’t get attached to guys after having sex; I’ve never been like that. I think I more get attached to the idea of going to sleep and waking up to the same someone consistently. That’s an impossible thing to have when you’re single.
The past couple of days, I’ve been in a rather somber mood. I wish I could find the one who would hold me and say, “I love you.” I long for that constant. I long for that burning desire to wake up in the arms of the same someone over and over again.
That’s another reason why I’m grateful for my Dom. I’m thankful that he talks to me daily. At the moment, he seems to be the only consistency I have in life.
The Sassy Sub Daily